Let my light Shine

It’s 10:05 pm now. I just sat at the table on my tier for one full hour without writing a single thing. I guess you can say I zoned out. But the entire time, I was talking to myself, (in my thoughts), and to God. I was trying to figure out what I wanted to write, and when I looked up at the clock, it was exactly one hour later, with nothing written on the paper. Numerous inmates walked by and asked if I was alright, and I would just nod my head expressionless. Usually some inmates would sit at the table, and try to strike up a conversation, but for one full hour, not one person did. Then I realized why. When you look unapproachable, people will not approach. I did not look any busier than any other night, same table, same seat; yet no one said more than a sentence to me. I was deep in thought, but to them I looked “out there,” as one inmate put it. All of my thoughts were positive, my prayers genuine, but my demeanor screamed, “zoned out,” “unapproachable,” “stressed.” I spent one full hour in thought, one full hour with purpose in my mind, but one full hour of being unapproachable.
How many times in the past was I like this? How many times did I miss out on being a light in the darkness? For that full hour, I looked so serious about what I was thinking and praying about, that no one came near me. I intended for this time in thought to be purposeful, but in reality, I spent one full hour shunning people away. Now I realize why I couldn’t write anything for an hour, I shut off the sources around me that have been fueling my thoughts. I believed I was concentrating on something that mattered, and I was, but I missed the point.
The moral of the story is that God gives us each a unique personality. My personality attracts other people’s attention because of having a positive attitude. Shutting off that gift for a full hour, shuts God’s light off in my life for that hour.
We are blessed with gifts and talents, we shouldn’t hide them from the world’s view. There may be a time and a place to look unapproachable, but not in the darkness. I need to show God’s light at all times, deep in thought or not, for what good is the use of a sundial in the shade?
Matthew 5:16: “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.”