Happy Birthday Brother

Dear John,

Happy Birthday to you, my oldest brother. Today would have been your 33rd birthday and although I miss you dearly, I am comforted knowing you are at complete peace and in the presence of our Heavenly Father. There are so many things I want to tell you, but I'm gonna keep this short, heartfelt, and to the point.

First off, your daughter Alivia is absolutely amazing and such a gift from God. I know you know this, but I want to tell you anyway. Alivia is the joy of our family and she will always have 3 father figures in the form of her Uncles. Today, mom and dad let her release some balloons to heaven and make wishes. I hope you got them. Oh yea, did Jesus tell you what her wish was? She asked Him if He would let you have some ice cream cake. Bro, she is so precious.

Yo man, I never told you this, but do you remember my high school basketball games and how you would show up early to watch the warm-ups? Well, you would sit in the same seat every home game with a huge smile on your face watching me intently. I hope you don't mind, but Mom told me how proud of me you were when you watched me play. But John, you have no idea how proud I was that you were at my games. Just watching you walk into the gym filled me with more confidence than I needed. Don't tell Coach Feraco this, but when you were watching, I only wanted to impress you. You were always my #1 fan.


On a more serious note, I never asked God "why" when you passed because I knew there was an ultimate plan that needed to be accomplished. I hope you're not mad at that. I'm not so sure how some see it now, but I never saw it more clearly than I do from prison. You paved the way for me and some of the truths you shared with me never made sense until now. You were my brother, and though those who didn't know you well only saw the surface, your heart could not help but to spill out to those you knew and trusted.

I envy you John, for you are with the Creator and King of this universe. But one day, we will all see you again; But not yet, Lord willing, because there are some things I need to do down here that will make you and Jesus proud. It's not gonna be easy, but if the Lord is for me, who can be against me?

Bro, can you believe there are people out there who only want to see me fail? But no worries cause they don't know they are motivating me even more. I'm finally "Being Still" after all these years, and you are one of the reasons for my growth, so thank you. Tell Jesus thank you for understanding too, he'll know what I mean. Alright bro, "Happy Birthday" again and I will write again soon. Miss you earthly, but happy for you heavenly. One last thing, I ponder these questions in your poem you wrote daily:

"What will I do to keep my will broken?
How will I live to have the word spoken?
In me and through me, firmly and truly,
I must give up my life in order to save it,
I must get on my knees and give praise to Him who gave it.
Break down my façade,
Put all faith in God,
And always remember who made me. By JDM

Your Brother, M. Maher
P.S. One Love