"Be Still"

I slept in today til 7:30 am, yep--- I said slept in. I would have never imagined in a million years that sleeping in to me now would be waking up at 8 am. I used to think sleeping in was not waking up before noon. But I was wide awake at 7:30 am and felt as if I missed the entire day. My parents came to visit this afternoon, and it was great to see them and talk in person. The hour and half goes fast though, but the visit hall is air-conditioned compared to the sauna like tier. So that made it even more relaxing.
I didn’t do anything after the visit up until church except eat dinner. Kind of a weird slow day and I think it’s because my day was filled with “nothingness” (not even sure if that’s a word?) Actually, I just looked it up and it is a word. It means nonexistent; empty space; a void. That sounds about right. Apart from the morning TV worship services and the night service, my day was filled with nothingness. I did not read any of my books, and I did not do any writing. Although, the physical activity of my day was void, it wasn’t completely lacking because I spent a lot of time in my thoughts. I’ve come to the conclusion, that time doesn’t mean much of anything to me anymore, but change does. I still respect time obviously, and am moving forward with it, but my transformation is my measuring stick. I am constantly reminding myself to “Be Still” until the change is complete. Then I realize that change will never be complete because it is an ongoing process. I want to be closer to God than I was yesterday and a better person overall, but I continue to stumble. I continue to fail, but I’m determined to keep going. I’m determined to not be conformed to this place, this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of my mind. (Roman 12:2 paraphrased)
I guess a day of physical nothingness isn’t so bad after all. I’m just so used to being active and productive, so I felt using my mind, without any physical action, was empty. But in fact, I was full. I’m gonna continue to attempt to prove what is that good and acceptable will of God in all that I do.
~~~DEDICATION OF MIND AND HEART~~~

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